Rachel Hyland, LPC-MHSP (temp)

IN ASSOCIATION WITH FULL CIRCLE COUNSELING OF TENNESSEE

Hi, I’m Rachel

Much of what you believe about yourself has been shaped by and reinforced through your closest relationships. These beliefs become the story you operate out of.

So, what’s your story? What do you believe about yourself and relationships? In a world where it has never been easier to connect, connections with others can be tricky. Maybe you feel scared to be vulnerable, so you hide behind masks of perfectionism and people-pleasing. You might act a certain way to fit in, but later judge yourself harshly when you're alone. Or maybe you can make connections easily, but quickly lose interest and pull away. If this sounds like you, it's likely that you've been hurt in past relationships and have developed unhelpful patterns in an attempt to protect yourself from future pain. I understand and want to help.

Heart wounds, or attachment wounds, can cause shame and anxiety, affecting the way you show up in relationships. Heart wounds often lead you to believe you are either too much or simply not good enough.

I help people understand their relational patterns, anxiety, and shame and develop healthier ways of relating to themselves and others. You don't have to hide or change yourself to connect with others. I'll support you in connecting with yourself through curiosity and self compassion. Let's explore your beliefs and rewrite your story together.

Dealing with Anxiety

  • Have you been experiencing persistent fearful or worried thoughts that seem to replay over and over again in your mind?

  • You might find it difficult to relax, fall asleep, or stay asleep throughout the night because of your worries.

  • Maybe you’ve noticed tension in your body resulting in headaches, stomach aches, or other physical sensations.

All of this can feel really scary. Anxiety is a normal part of life, but when it becomes disruptive to daily living, you may need some help managing it.

When we experience anxiety, we are often imagining a worst case scenario and projecting that fear into the future. We spin our wheels worrying in an attempt to protect ourselves from that imagined fear before it happens. But of course we can’t, because in the present moment, it is only an imagined fear, not reality. It can certainly feel real, though.

If you’re experiencing excessive fearful or worried thoughts, I can help you process your anxiety and give you tools to manage your symptoms.

What is Shame?

  • Do you ever worry about what others think of you so much that it holds you back from new experiences?

  • Have you avoided sharing your true thoughts or feelings because you are afraid to be embarrassed or rejected?

  • Do you often think you have to  “have it all together” or “get things right” to feel acceptable to others?

  • You may have a tendency to control outcomes or people-please to feel safe.

These are just a few symptoms of shame.

Shame is a sneaky emotion. It is so embedded into who we believe we are that we often cannot see our own shame. Shame is different from guilt. Guilt says, “I did something bad.”  Shame says, “I AM bad for what I did.”

Shame serves to keep us small, hidden, and isolated from others. It makes us feel like we are flawed or there is something wrong with us and it can even cause us to become defensive and shame others in return. For those who desire deep connection with others, shame prompts us to hide the parts of ourselves that feel unacceptable. It blocks authenticity and intimacy and prevents us from experiencing the very thing that can set us free: Connection.

If this feels painfully familiar, I can help you explore your feelings and develop the self-compassion necessary for a healthy relationship with yourself and others.

What Are Attachment  Wounds?

  • Do you have a pattern of becoming anxious in relationships, fearing your partner will reject or abandon you?

  • Have you ever justified why your partner treats you poorly?

  • Do you often feel responsible for the negative emotions others are feeling?

  • Maybe you often feel smothered in your relationships and need excessive alone time.

  • Perhaps it’s difficult for you to build trust in relationships.

  • Is your inner dialog frequently negative?

If you answered. yes to these questions, chances are you have an attachment wound.

An attachment is a bond you have within a significant relationship. An attachment wound is a form of relational trauma that wounds the bond between people in a close relationship. These attachments typically occur between a child and a caregiver or in a romantic partnership.

When your close relationships feel unsafe because of things like neglect, abuse, abandonment, or extreme distress, you can get hurt emotionally. If the safety isn't restored or you keep getting hurt, it can add up and make it hard to form healthy, secure connections with others. It can also have long term effects on your nervous system and overall mental health and wellbeing.

If you believe you may have an attachment wound, I can help you process and grieve your pain.

“The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.” — Carl Rogers

Reach Out Today

I’d love to hear from you. Contact me to schedule a free phone consultation.

Contact Info

103 Continental Place, Suite 400
Brentwood, TN 37027

Hours
Monday / Wednesday / Thursday
By appointment only

Phone
615-933-9431